15 YEARS A SHADOW OF HURT
THE JOURNEY
They met during their University days at Ekpoma. They were course-mates. They became friends precisely on the 30th Nov 1997.
They graduated in 1998 and went on for their service years during which they maintained their friendship.
The lady served in Kebbi State and later settled in Lagos thereafter.
Ayodeji served in Abia State and later chose to stay in Port Harcourt after the service year. He was in Port Harcourt until November 2003 when he relocated to the US. New York to be precise.
In February 2005, he briefly traveled down to Lagos to ask for the lady’s hand in marriage.
He would shuttle 2 more times between New York and Lagos to solidify the union before finally returning home in September of 2005 to plan fully well for their November 2005 wedding.
Top ranking brass of the ministry where the mother served graced the ocassion. We are talking of someone who literally grew up surrounded by daddy and mummy G.Os left and right. People that you only see in the VIP section.
THE MARRIAGE & RED FLAG
If people that carry anointing at a wedding party are the determinants of a successful marriage, Ayodeji’s marriage should have been running over with anointing.
First baby landed in 2006. A baby girl. The first thing noticed was that the wife refused to allow her mother-in-law (of blessed memory) come near the child – her own first grand child ever.
This is the same mother-in-law that would give her VIP status and access during all church monthly special programmes at the Church City. The mother-in-law lived permanently at the Church City, right from the inception of the city. That’s where Deji grew up at as well. Ayodeji allowed that to pass for the sake of peace.
The wife on the other hand, used her own authority to bring in a maid from Ghana into the house to help her with child nursing. She refused the help that her mother-in-law would have done for free to hire a third party for it. Don’t bother asking about her own mother.
She didn’t stop there. She closed the family doors to all husband’s siblings including the one in the university. Yet, her mother-in-law never withdrew the VIP access or status she got for her. She also extended same gesture to the Ghanian maid too.
Within 3 months of the birth of the first child, in 2006, Ayodeji heard the first rumour about the wife’s previous marriage which was never disclosed to him before.
HOW IT HAPPENED
Deji’s mum used to have the Ghanaian maid’s phone number because she used to visit her during camp meeting because of the VIP perks her visitors used to enjoy.
It was during one of such camp visit that the Ghanian maid used her own mouth to confess how she knew or met Deji’s wife. Who knows if it was the prayers of the saints that pushed her to confess to Deji’s mum?
The Ghanian maid confessed that Deji’s wife was actually still a wife to another man while legally married to Deji. She confessed that she was also the maid to the wife at the other husband’s house.
The Ghanian maid used her own mouth to spill the beans directly to Deji’s late mum during one of her visits to Camp City. She showed evidences confirming her claim.
When the wife saw she was made out by her Ghanaian maid from her Part 1 husband’s house, she did a bold face at first. She later confessed she was ignorant to have taken blood oaths with the man in question. It was as if it was because of blood oaths that she could not leave the former husband totally. The guy called Yxxxxxx from Auchi in Edo State used to be a banker at the time.
Peter, wife showed no remorse but rather became deviously manipulative. All these in 2006 and before the marriage was even a year old. Ayodeji was no longer himself. His health was badly affected.
In order to work out a solution to the marriage, and for the husband to take take care of his failing health, Deji was advised to move out and stay close to his work place. Wife and and the child were still being fully maintained by the husband.
Deji would come home on weekends to spend time with his daughter, take her to church and then return her to the mother.
By this time, the full picture of the whole story had come to light. Deji saw how he had been used and played by 2 fraud partners who were into diabolical stuffs.
The wife tracked Deji down to the company’s guest house where he was lodging every now and then and before he could realise what was going on, Deji found out the wife was pregnant for him again. Child number 2. Another girl. Deji accepted responsibility and even became more doting as his health got better.
THUNDERSTRIKE
IN 2009, when woman found out that she got Deji where she wanted him concerning the children, she disappeared with them. She just packed out of the house with the girls that were both 3 years old and 1 year old at the time.
For 2 years, Deji’s family members were trying really hard to save his life. He broke down as he had a meltdown. The children were his life…his breath. He literally stopped living.
The senior pastor that spoke with me confirmed it was a spiritual warfare before they could get Deji back on his feet.
By 2012, the wife broke all contacts with the husband and family. This was when they realised that they had no family of the wife that is original that they could go to.
It is believed that the wife went back to her old husband who was now more like an Alfa/imam cum Babalawo. Deji was advised to forget the woman, seek for annulment and hope for the children to grow up and seek him out. But that was too much a cost to pay for Deji.
At one time, he heard they were in Abuja for some years and later moved to Ibadan, but was advised by top authority close to his mum to stop giving himself hypertension and psychological trauma. He was advised to accept the fact that he was a victim of organised honey trap that got him to marry another man’s wife.
Deji had studied the timeline of their relationship, and even during my interview with him, wherein I asked him sensitive questions, we couldn’t pin point how he was played.
The question is ‘what happened to this lady between 2003 and 2005 that Deji was in the US?
Even before then, to Deji, he could not figure out any lapses that shows that ‘his friend’ at the time was already in a blood oath relationship.
GOING FORWARD:
Deji has not married nor be in any relationship since his wife left with his children. I believe everyone is doing everything for Deji to see if he can find love again and give it another go.
His mother passed on during the course of Deji’s marriage and life trauma that he was served. I remember the senior pastor calling me from the Church City asking me to help reach out to Deji as they had no idea where he was and how badly he took it when he learnt of his mother’s passing. I remember speaking to Deji and he was so incoherent and all over the place. He was talking opposite of what I was talking to him. I had to commit him and his state of mind into God’s hands.
ABORTED BREAKTHROUGH
Briefly in 2021, the wife suddenly reached out to Deji to ask him if he wanted to see his children as they were now grown. (I saw excerpt of the transcript of the brief conversation)
10/30/21, 5:47 PM
(Ex Wife)
Where and how can one reach you? It is urgent and important.
10/30/21, 7:05 PM
Deji sent
07XXXXXXXXX
(Ex Wife)
It’s about Xxxx. I believe it is time she stays with you. She is 15 plus now and needs a father figure.
Deji sent
What class is she now?
(Ex Wife)
Ss2
Deji sent
Ok fine
(Ex Wife)
I will work on her leaving the school she is in now and get back to you later. Soon. Thank you and good night.
Deji sent
Thank you
Immediately Deji saw this, he swung into action to prepare for his daughter’s arrival. His late mum who was still alive then immediately informed the Most Senior Mummy of the ministry who ordered full scholarship for the girl at the exclusive new school she was building then.
Overnight…muteness, followed by quietness, and buried by deafening silence from the ex-wife. Nobody has heard anything from the mother, and no one knows which state of the federation she is pulling strings from. Funny thing is, she could actually be in that same Lagos! That girl just turned 18 this April, she has gone 15 years without a father figure….her father!
Deji has on permanent standby the number she gave the ex wife…hoping that next minute her call will come through.
Last time he saw his children was in 2009. Money is not his problem. If you ask Deji to come to the UK tomorrow, he will. He doesn’t have visa limitations or restrictions. He only stays back in Nigeria waiting for the day his children will come back to him.
He has no woman in his life. He never had any in his life other than the woman who deceived and betrayed him, marrying him while she was also married to another or joined to another man!
DEAR EX-WIFE OF DEJI
In case you are on FB and this gets to you by the way of sharing, please reach out to me. My name is Amos Ajewole. Let me hear you out. I want to hear what Deji did wrong. Just say something that will make me put some of the blames on Deji.
I have for some years now been receiving all facts and figures with dates and times evidences from Deji and those that witnessed or know about your wedding and marriage. Let’s hear your own side of the story too. You have played enough with his mind and mental health. Let’s release him so he can move on and find love again. The 15 years of punishment is enough.